Steampunk fiction, reviews and interviews

Soup of the day: With Collin the Octopus

Hello! Mrs Albert Baker here, otherwise known as The Last Witch Of Pendle. Obviously there is no Pendle any more, since The Chronic Agronauts utterly destroyed it with treacle and sprats, but Ive set myself up quite nicely here in Lancaster, running this little soup kitchen for the street urchins. There certainly are a lot of them and Im always looking for helping hands to cook up and serve something delicious!

I am extremely happy this morning to welcome my dear friend Collin the Octopus who has made the long trek out of bed, down the stairs and across the street to my little kitchen to tell you all about something rather exciting that he will be taking part in this summer. Good morning Collin!

Good morning Mrs Baker, thankyou so much for letting me come and help in the soup kitchen today.

That’s quite alright my dear, your tentacles are extremely helpful when chopping up the vegetables. But while our lovely soup is simmering away why don’t you tell us all what you are going to be up to over the next few weeks – aside from selling lemonade that is!

Yes of course! This summer I am going to be travelling the globe, visiting some of my fabulous friends and having tea with them in order to raise awareness for the charity RMH at Alder Hey Children’s Hospital. It’s a Free Home Away From Home for the families of children staying in Alder Hey Children’s Hospital. It costs the charity £25 for one family to stay for one night in this facility and without it many families would not be able to visit their ill children every day.

That sounds like a very god cause Collin, but why have you chosen that charity in particular?

Well, when Penny’s  daughter was diagnosed with a life threatening condition the only place she could be treated was Alder Hey Children’s Hospital in Liverpool – many miles away from her own home. The family  were paying over a hundred pounds each day in taxi fares trying to visit her and arrange childcare for their other children.

Thankfully they were assessed as being eligible for free accommodation at RMH in the grounds of the hospital. This meant that they could all stay on site and so their daughter had her whole family around her and both parents could be with her during her scans and operation knowing that the other children were safe and cared for nearby by their grandmother.

Fortunately Penny’s daughter made a full recovery and was soon able to continue her care at home, I can only imagine how much more vital the free facilities at RMH become when a child requires long term admission or has an illness which is terminal.

Indeed! And if your story has inspired some of us here to make a donation to support this worthy cause, how can we do that?

Well, you can donate by visiting my Just Giving page right here…

No amount is too small… or indeed too large! Donating through JustGiving is simple, fast and totally secure. Your details are safe with JustGiving – they’ll never sell them on or send unwanted emails. Once you donate, they’ll send your money directly to the charity. So it’s the most efficient way to donate – saving time and cutting costs for the charity.

Marvellous! Well I hope you enjoy your working holiday Collin, will you send us a postcard?

Of course! I will be posting photographs of all my RMH At Alder Hey Tea Parties right here on the blog  throughout the month of August, along with updates of how much money has been raised.

Splendid, well I hope you have a marvellous time Collin and I hope that, if our little blog here has entertained or aided you in any way over the last few months you will consider making a donation to this very worthy cause. Now then, let us start dishing up some soup!

The soup kitchen will be closed now for the summer, as all the poor dear urchins will be out on the streets selling lemonade for that monster Montmornecy, but I will see you all again in september and don’t forget, if you would like to come and visit me in the soup kitchen do drop me an email at and we can arrange something for the autumn.

Until then, blessings on your brew my dears!

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